Monday, March 17, 2008

the end

Don't you have anything better to do besides let yourself become so consumed with hatred and jealousy, that you're willing to dig yourself into a deeper hole than you are already in?
Before you make the decision to act like a bitch, do you honestly believe that you will be in a better place than before?
What makes you think you have the right to threaten a good person, just because you simply weren't worthy to come along for the ride?
Why are you so fucking concerned about where I am, yet so afraid to confront me yourself? Stop using my friends as scapegoats - they're worth so much more than that.

Get over it. You're NOT better than me.

I would say "sorry" in hopes of making you feel better, but I didn't do anything wrong. And I just don't think you deserve my sympathy.

I know you're insecure because I am a part of something that you can't infiltrate. I know you hate it when my name comes up in conversation, because those instances are often accompanied by expressions of fondness. I know you're jealous of the memories I have... especially the ones you will likely never hear about. I know it kills you to think that I have qualities you will never possess. I know you wish I didn't exist, because then I wouldn't be a threat... I wouldn't have been there, with him, and with everyone else, while you were forced to stay home alone.

It didn't have to be this way. We could have made amends... I was ready to take that step to put shit behind us and clear the air. I was going to invite you outside for a cigarette, and tell you my intentions were innocent. I wanted to make you feel better, more comfortable, and help you - even if I didn't want to be your best friend. I was going to tell you that it was just about music and friendship, that you didn't have to worry because I'm not trying to get in your way. Whether you believed me or not, I was willing to extend you the courtesy of truth - without the fucking mindgames that women are always so willing to play on each other.

But you fucked it up. Without knowing the full story, you jumped to conclusions and laid the blame on an innocent person instead of examining yourself. There's a reason that I was there and you weren't. But instead of understanding that reason, you turned to insults and ruined your chances of ever being fully accepted. You made enemies, instead of allies. You didn't even come after me - you went after my friend. You ruined his weekend, and now it's personal.

Your threats don't scare anybody. And if you think they do, you are truly unaware of the type of bond this circle of friends has. You have no fucking idea.

You've been trying so hard to convince everyone that I was wrong about you. But this time I didn't have to do or say anything. You ruined it for yourself. So grow up, and move on. We don't want you here.


Roxanne said...

Alright alright, is it too late to say I'm sorry?

Haha, god I hope this wasn't too serious to lighten up a bit.

Kim_Brulee said...

Here, Here! Don't fuck with people's friends. step up and deal with your issues one on one, and don't expect that people will accept you when there are SIX YEARS of life that you will NEVER understand or have the pleasure to experience!

Solomon said...

Damn! Who is this about anyway? Or am I sticking my fingers into things I shouldn't ? . . . hehe . . .